Recently, I heard people talking about the physical challenges they have been experiencing this year. Because I am moving through a similar process, I thought it would be a good idea to write on my blog about it. By now, you’ll have noticed that I like writing about my experiences in the hope they will help others on the same path. That’s the intention behind this post too.
This morning I woke up with a massive headache, my shoulders and neck felt tight and my back tender. My body is trying to reach out to me, to make me listen to my resistance, the refusal I am feeling through periods of change. This is not the first time it happens. When the river of transformation starts unleashing its power through my being, my body re-acts with pain, illness and fear. With the years, I have learned that my physical body, DNA, cells, they are like storage rooms for every single experience I live in this life and for my ancestral memories too. They are all embedded in the intricate tapestry of my DNA. My body knows! So why don’t I listen? Because it is easier to dwell in the comfort of illusion than to truly face myself.
Many of us are going through a transformation and the physical body is adjusting to it. There are many reasons this is happening now: our ancestral energy and the energy on the planet going through a deep cleansing, just to name a few. We are going to see many storms and natural “disasters” (or as I like to call them: adjustments), because we are not caring enough for our planet, but She is. Our body is deeply connected to the Earth and while She heals and transforms, our body heals and transforms too.
My story as Michela and my transformation process started long time ago. I am a Beltaine baby, reincarnated on Earth on May 3rd with the help of mom and dad. Mom always tells me that I decided to emerge from her womb 3 weeks later than the due date. I like to think that she made such a cosy and sacred space for me in her womb that I didn’t want to leave it. For the first 5 years of my life, I was often sick, and I had low iron levels. I find it fascinating that I was 3 weeks late and it took me 5 years to build my immune system. Three is the number that follows me everywhere. Five is the number that brings transformation and I feel like it took me 5 years to fully transform in a human being. Growing up and in my adult years too, I never felt at home on earth. I was always ungrounded and felt out of place. Eventually, through many years of healing, one day I realize that: I am home, and I am deeply connected to Mother Earth through my body, soul and spirit.
This body that holds my soul anchored firm on the skin of Gaia and that makes me ground my roots in her womb heart is a sacred container. I remember when I used to hate my body. It was never good enough. Experience after experience, I realized that I can’t feed my body only with food, it needs much more. My love and gratitude, my commitment to keep it healthy are as important as food and water are.
In this process of remembering and healing, I noticed how my body was adjusting to my transformation then and how it is adjusting to it now. I have been struggling with my health since the winter solstice of 2017. I have been going through, bacterial and viral infections (one after the other), weight loss, fatigue and all the symptoms that all these body reactions produce. I know that I am going through a deep transformation again and my body is adjusting to it. When I was a baby, I had my family taking care of me 24/7 and now as an adult it is up to me to take care of myself.
When my body is tired or sick, I learnt how to be quite and listen to what it has to say. Is it tired because I over did it? Is it feeling fatigued because there is something I am trying to avoid? What are the fears that come up during changing times? Am I putting myself under pressure because in my head I can’t trust anyone, and I must do this on my own? Do I believe that I have limitations? My body knows! I just need to keep remembering how to listen to it. When something feels out of place, when my body is showing symptoms of illness, I try to take few hours off my daily schedule, find a place in nature and lie down on the Earth. I wrote about this several times, and I am rewriting about it now as it is important for us to remember the way we are connected to Mother and Her powerful Womb. One of my teachers, my cat, showed me that way, when he wasn’t well. I was looking at him laying down on the earth among plants we have in the garden. There and then, he reminded me of the time when to heal our body and soul, we simply lay our tired bodies on the Earth.
Mother is ready to embrace me if I surrender to Her. The Earth in all Her Wisdom knows how to guide me and help me heal. She’ll show me the way. But let’s be clear and straightforward, She is not going to heal me simply because I am surrendering. She will show me the way and guide me through the transformation process but in the end I’ll have to do the work!
Please listen to what She has to say. She talks to you through your body because we don’t listen to the energy, BUT we listen to the pain.
After years of confusion, painful memories, healing journeys and profound connections to Mother that connection became clear, and I felt it with every fibre of my being.
One day, my menstrual blood running down my thighs made me feel this connection between my body, a woman’s body, Mother Earth, and Goddess. This powerful, visceral, profound and primordial connection is not a dream. We are living reality of Goddess creative power, wisdom and love from where existence is born and where existence returns.
© Michela Sborchia ALL RIGHTS RESERVED