Last night I felt my Womb pulsating. It was like a heartbeat but deeper. Its sound was gentle like a drop of rain falling on a leaf but powerful like the vibrations of a thousand drums.
I looked down at my body, the natural curve of my belly and I thought “how a body so tiny can hold so much energy?” We have been conditioned by different factors to think that we have limitations, that our potential is limited and we can go only so far…. But when we feel our womb pulsating and our heart beating, we feel that we are more than we think we are. Our bodies are beautiful beings created to hold something very powerful and to protect it.
One of the purposes of the body is to ground us into the Earth. It’s through our physical body that we plant our roots. And it is through the body that we feel. When emotions run through it, we feel shivers, butterflies in our stomach, vibrations that make us giggle and laugh, intense emotions that make us cry. When the silver drops or tears run down our cheeks, we feel even more. We feel through our senses: sight, smell, hearing, taste, touch. When we speak with Spirit, waves of ecstatic energy flows through our entire body. When we make love a current of strong erotic energy charged with Love runs through us.
How primal is that?
I was reminded this year many times of how the body feels everything in order to tell us what we are missing or avoiding. I had to start looking inside of me to those energies that I didn’t want to acknowledge. I kept saying to myself that I was ready to move on, that I didn’t want to dwell in the energy of the past years but every time I would do that, a reminder of the past surfaced from the jungle of my stories. At first I would dismiss it. I really didn’t want to dwell in the stories that I was trying to escape. I didn’t want to be chained to the past. I truly deeply needed to move on. But my body didn’t let me. I was constantly sick. The body was saying to me to stop and listen to my emotions, the parts of my self that I was avoiding. “How can you move on with all those unfinished businesses”? The anger and resentment I stored in my organs were yelling at me. “Please stop. Be present for yourself and listen. Truly deeply honestly listen”! I was hurting still. I hadn’t moved on.
I was forced to stop by my body, my human teacher, and I did. I listened to my my physical body, to what it had to say. Every pain, sensation I felt inside and on my skin had a message. All the anger, resentment accumulated in the past was finally showing up. These energies had to be acknowledged, addressed with respect. I had to listen to the teachings they were bringing me, the knowledge they were sharing and the wisdom they were bestowing on me. When I asked them why I had to go through such intense experiences, and pain they simply replied “why not you”?
© Michela Sborchia ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
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